Wednesday, August 18, 2010

How you survive when you discover your bf is cheating?

Well, not cheating physically, he claimed he did not cheat physically. But i found out he had been sending sms to girls like i can't stop missing you, and I love you. I was devastated. But after some sessions, we decide to forget everything. We decide to make it work. But how do I stop being panic? How do I stop wondering if he ever really cheat, will he let me down, how do i calm myself and stop panicking?How you survive when you discover your bf is cheating?
I'm sorry to hear what you are going through - I think many can relate to you. My thoughts and I hope they help:





1. Back up a bit - is this guy all that? What are you getting from this relationship? Are you rationalizing why you are with him? Your heart will never be fooled by your mind no matter how good at reasoning you are with it? If your needs are not being met (forget the panic - I'm talking about fulfillment of heart, mind and soul), then your heart will always long for more. If he comes up short then what are you doing? You will need to decide if you are willing to go through a little pain now for great joy later. A successful relationship requires many ongoing factors. Does this guy have the chops - writing to other women was underhanded and selfish. A successful relationship requires that the person be trustworthy and unselfish. What other signs is he giving? Being honest with yourself about what you deserve in a personal friend/best friend/boyfriend will give you strength. Get advice from people who really love you and see this fella for the fella he is and be open to the truth.


2. If this guy is not all that then are you willing to do what it takes to meet the guy you want even if it hurts for awhile breaking it off with this bozo?


3. So if this guy is worth it then I'd say to him: You have to rebuild / earn my trust if you want to be with me because things have changed for me. Court me if you want to be with me.. Start over as it were.


4. If you believe in God, then believe His promises for your life and put those promises in mind when your emotions what to get the better of you. Jesus died to give us true peace.





God bless - take careHow you survive when you discover your bf is cheating?
It won't stop girl believe me ,i'm in the same situation as you, and it's hard for you to forget, you will always feel insecure, afraid that he could be doing something again behind your back, you want to believe him when he say sorry, even if he try to do right by making things work, you still feel sad and scared, you are not sure if you could trust him completely.


I don't know what to say, keep your eyes open at all times and don't forgive him the next time he cheat, we don't deserve to be treated that way.
If he says he loves you after that, its a lie. All he's doing is waiting for a chance for someone to come along and in the end finish with you. I'd hit the nail on the end now and don't let people treat you like that. My dad was a cheat and left my mam. Clinged to her till his future wife to be popped up and left her. It wont be as bad if you do the finishing. Don't let him worm is way back in your good books because then he will think he can walk all over you. He will think oh well I got away with this one. Another one won't hurt. I'd leave him or at least be on your guard but you can't live your life worrying and being on your guard you need to get on your life and meet someone worth while.
if you love him then you'll trust him but if u love him and are seriously curious then go through his phone when he isnt looking untill you feel like you trust him completely.





But if it was me and he was the one who told me that he was sending the girl messages and that they didnt mean anything then id trust him, but if i found out on my own then id go through his phone.
Wow well maybe you should have time apart if you feel he will not be true to you. Why stay in the relationship if you dont trust who you are with?? Just weigh the pros and cons and if the pros outweigh the cons stay with him but let him know he cant do that anymore if he does then you have to move on. If the cons outweigh the pros just move on because you dont trust him anyway that is why you are panicking. Trust ur gut.
I would survive, but he wouldn't. With texts like that, it's obvious he's already cheated physically. You're not panicking, you're just concerned. I would have him explain himself, with a really damn good explanation. It's your boyfriend, your life, but personally I would dump that sack of crap. No offense.
Paranoia gets the best of me with stuff like that.


You can either leave him and be relieved or think of only happy things and ignore whatever bad things.... But the second one never works.


I recently have been panicking about stuff like that with my boyfriend. I just made him reassure me about everything and now I'm as happy as a smiley face :)
you dont need that sht get someone new


he claims to not have fukd right? but he says i love u to someone else which means he gave her a part of his heart and he lied and betrayed you the whole time, now why d0 u wanna be with someone like that?


dont make it work bc ur only making it easier for him, he cheats he goes and does w.e n u stupidly forgive him, hell naw make him regret playin u n lyin to u.!!


he did it once and he's gona do it again, trust me


and your'e never gonna stop panicking bc he lost ur trust and its gonna take years b4 he can regain it bc ur always gonna be wondering if he's doing it again and ur just gona drive urself ccrazzzzy so i say leave him, and upgrade.
Well do you trust him? Because if you dont that is one downfall and this relationship is not going to work, so you might aswell just give up now, no matter how hard it will be. But if you do trust him then just simply talk to him about it, watch his face when you talk to him and you will know if he is lying!
Think you'll crumble? Just wanna lay down and die? Oh no, not you.





You will survive.





As long as you know how to love, you know you'll be alive. You've got all your life to live, and all your love to give.
You are being very controlling. If he is just talking to people on the internet, chances are very good that it will never go any further. I don't think you could ever trust that he won't do it again. Sorry xox
Survive...? Wow...





How about people that are a mile of military confrontations? What would you call this?





Give me a break...it's not a survival...it's a choice.
i think in some cases emotionally cheating on your significant other is worse than physical.





i'm sorry deary but i think he cheated on your emotionally. i would dump the screwball.
How about loving yourself? You are disrespecting yourself. Lose this guy.
life's too short to be panicking about guys


just leave him and find someone who will make your happy and your life worth while
if he sends stuff like that


he has obviously cheated already.
Ok for now just say that nothing happens and if it happens again then its over
forget about him
HOW CAN HE LOVE YOU WHEN HE TELLS EVERY ONE HE LOVES THEM.. DROP HIM.
just leave and wish him well with his life... find yourself someone new as a rebound and have some fun..

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